Dear Diary,
Today is the first day of fall. 🍂
Which apparently means I am supposed to immediately pull out the sweaters, boots, pumpkin-scented candles, and oversized mugs while staring peacefully out the window at colorful leaves drifting to the ground.
Except…
I live in Southern California. 😂
California looked at the calendar this morning, saw FIRST DAY OF FALL, and said:
“That’s cute. Anyway…”
Because there’s a very good chance I’ll be standing in front of a fall display wearing sandals while the temperature outside is still disrespectfully close to summer.
Nothing says autumn quite like buying a pumpkin-scented candle while your air conditioner is running.
But even when the weather refuses to cooperate, there’s something about the beginning of fall that feels different.
Maybe it’s because fall has always seemed like nature’s reminder that change doesn’t have to happen all at once to still be happening.
And lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about seasons.
🍂 Some Things Are Meant to Fall Away
Trees don’t panic when their leaves begin to fall.
They don’t desperately try to glue them back onto the branches.
They don’t schedule an emergency meeting.
They don’t create a PowerPoint presentation called “Leaf Retention Strategy: Q4.”
They just let them go.
Humans?
Oh, no.
We will carry something three seasons past its expiration date and then wonder why our arms hurt. 😂
Relationships.
Expectations.
Old habits.
Guilt.
Responsibilities that were never ours.
Plans that no longer fit.
Other people’s opinions.
And sometimes an argument from 2017 that we are absolutely still prepared to revisit if necessary.
Because I have receipts. 😂
Sometimes we hold onto things simply because we’ve had them for a long time.
But longevity doesn’t automatically mean something still belongs in your life.
“Maybe fall is a reminder that letting go isn’t always losing. Sometimes it’s making room.”
And maybe there are a few things I can allow to hit the ground this season without chasing after them.
🌻 I Don’t Need to Become the Old Me Again
I’ve spent enough time looking backward to know there are pieces of my old life—and my old self—that I will probably always miss.
But I’m learning not to make the past the standard by which I measure the present.
The woman I am today has different priorities.
Different boundaries.
Different expectations.
And definitely a different tolerance for foolishness. 😂
Somewhere along the way, “No” became a complete sentence.
And listen…
That has been LIBERATING.
No dissertation.
No PowerPoint.
No supporting documentation.
No three business days for rebuttal.
Just…
No.
Look at growth. 😂👏🏾
I’ve also learned that rest doesn’t have to be earned, every invitation doesn’t require a yes, and changing my mind doesn’t mean I failed.
Sometimes it simply means I learned something.
That’s growth, too.
🍁 Not Every Season Is Supposed to Be a Blooming Season
That’s one of the things I love about fall.
At first glance, it looks like everything is ending.
Leaves change.
Flowers disappear.
Days get shorter.
Everything becomes quieter.
But underneath all of that, nature is preparing.
Resting.
Conserving.
Making room.
Nature doesn’t spend October screaming:
“I SHOULD BE DOING MORE!”
The tree is not standing there comparing itself to another tree.
“Look at Susan over there. She still has 47 leaves. I only have 12. I really need to get myself together.” 😂
No.
The tree does what the season requires.
Maybe I could learn something from the tree.
Not every season has to be productive.
Not every season has to produce something everyone else can see.
Sometimes the assignment really is:
Rest. Reflect. Release. Reset.
And for somebody who likes plans, schedules, answers, and knowing what comes next…
That might be the actual assignment.
🍎 Okay, But Can We Talk About the FUN Part of Fall?
Because personal growth is wonderful and everything…
but fall also means baking season.
And that is important. 😂
There is something about cooler weather that makes turning on the oven feel like an invitation instead of a threat.
Cakes.
Pies.
Cookies.
Warm desserts.
Holiday recipes.
Suddenly, I’m looking at cinnamon like:
“Well, hello there. It’s been a while.”
Then come the fall decorations, cozy evenings, Halloween, Thanksgiving, family gatherings, and that unmistakable feeling that the holiday season is getting closer.
I love that part.
I love the traditions.
I love the food.
I love making memories.
I love the excuse to make the house feel extra cozy.
And I love the completely unnecessary seasonal purchases that somehow become necessary once I walk into a store.
Did I need another fall mug?
Technically?
No.
Emotionally?
Mind your business. 😂☕
🎃 And Then There’s Pumpkin Spice…
We need to discuss this.
Every year, fall arrives and suddenly pumpkin takes over America.
Pumpkin coffee.
Pumpkin muffins.
Pumpkin bread.
Pumpkin cereal.
Pumpkin candles.
Pumpkin body wash.
Pumpkin dog treats.
At some point, I fully expect somebody to announce pumpkin-spice motor oil.
And some of y’all are READY.
The first pumpkin drink appears and suddenly it’s:
“THIS IS MY SEASON!” 🍂🎃☕
Meanwhile, I’m just trying to figure out when Southern California is going to provide weather cool enough for me to wear the cute fall clothes I’ve already mentally selected.
Because I refuse to suffer for fashion.
Okay…
That’s a lie.
I’ve suffered for shoes before.
But I’m trying to grow. 😂
🎵 Music Playing…
“A Change Is Gonna Come” — Sam Cooke
Because beneath all the jokes, that’s really what today represents for me.
Change.
Not necessarily the dramatic, blow-up-your-entire-life kind.
Sometimes change happens quietly.
One boundary.
One decision.
One release.
One realization.
One new habit.
One moment when you recognize:
I don’t respond to that the way I used to.
And suddenly you realize you’ve been changing all along.
💭 Reflection Corner
As I enter this new season, I’m not making some giant list of things I need to completely transform before winter.
I’m not becoming Kia 2.0: Fall Edition. 😂
I’m simply asking myself:
🍂 What am I ready to release?
🌻 What part of myself deserves more appreciation?
🍁 Where am I forcing something that may have naturally reached its end?
☕ What deserves more of my time and energy this season?
💜 And what would happen if I stopped treating rest like something I have to earn?
I don’t have every answer.
For someone who likes answers, that’s annoying.
But I’m learning to live with it. 😂
Maybe I don’t need to know exactly what the next season will bring.
Maybe I don’t need a five-year plan for every branch of my life.
Maybe I can simply enter this season with fewer expectations and more curiosity.
More boundaries.
More gratitude.
More family.
More laughter.
More baking.
More moments that have absolutely nothing to do with being productive.
And definitely more trips to the beach because, let’s not get carried away here…
Fall or not, I am still a beach girl. 🌊😂
🌻 So Here’s to Fall
To cooler mornings.
To cozy evenings.
To baking something just because the house should smell good.
To family and traditions.
To changing leaves—even if I occasionally have to leave Southern California to actually see them. 😂
To releasing what no longer belongs.
To appreciating what remains.
To giving myself permission to rest.
And to understanding that changing seasons don’t always mean I’m starting over.
Maybe I don’t have to have everything figured out before the next season begins.
The trees certainly don’t ask permission before they change.
So I’ll change, too.
I’ll release some things.
I’ll hold tighter to others.
I’ll rest when I need to.
I’ll laugh whenever possible.
And I’ll keep becoming whoever this season is asking me to be.
Preferably while wearing a cute fall sweater…
just as soon as California gets the memo that it’s actually fall. 😂🍂
💬 Reader Reflection
What are you ready to leave behind as you enter this new season—and what are you making room for instead?
Until next time,
Kia Lorice
Founder • Author • Advocate • Future Wellness Coach
The Dual Diagnosis Diaries | Kia’s Journey 🌻
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